Helping heart-centered people pleasing solopreneurs find their authentic voice so they can become more profitable.
Being a people pleaser is an almost impossible filter from which to run a profitable business.
Are you a people pleaser or wonder if you are a people pleaser?
Do you struggle to make your business profitable and wonder why?
Do you struggle to set your fees?
Do you struggle to state your fees?
Do you give your services/products away for free or at a very low cost?
Are you ready to claim your authentic self and voice? Are you ready to set boundaries?
Are you ready to start making profits?
Martha Davis Alexander, JD, Mediator, Certified Money Breakthrough Business Coach, Certified Sacred Money Archetype Coach, Certified Life Coach and healer
Hi, My name is Martha. I spent 50 years of my life being a people pleaser and making decisions based upon survival mindsets I developed during my parents’ divorce. 50 years. Those mindsets served me well as a child; and not so well as an adult, wife, mother and solopreneur.
At the heart of it all, I became a people pleaser and a chameleon. I was so desperate for love and acceptance, for people to like me that I stopped focusing on growing into and knowing who I was, and instead simply became who I thought others wanted me to be so that they would like and love me. I felt more like a willow tree with my trunk blowing every which way instead of the strong tall oak I had been in the process of becoming.
Being a people pleaser created chaos in me – I volunteered for everything (cub scouts, PTA, fundraising and anything else that was asked. I did not think about whether I wanted to do the job, or what the time commitment meant in my life, I simply said yes and did the job, sometimes not as well as I wished. In fact, at one point I asked my husband to help me say NO and even after practicing and knowing that I wanted to say no when the actual conversation happened YES was what I said.
It was as if I had no control over my own life. I became frustrated, overwhelmed, angry, and resentful about all the time and effort I put into these roles all to make friends, to be liked and to be part of the community. I was desperate and my desperation for friends and to be liked was thick and embarrassing. The feel of rejection was very real. I spent time every night agonizing over conversations in my head so that I could do better the next day. I was exhausted, frustrated, overwhelmed, resentful and lonely. I could not truly make deep connections and friendships until I showed up as me. The problem was I did not have any clue who I was, what I wanted or even how to dream. This is a common pattern for people pleasers. And it can be debilitating, at least it was for me.
Then I found the process to become my authentic self with boundaries and my own voice. I no longer struggle with people pleasing. And the freedom is marvelous.